|
Post by gigi on Sept 25, 2011 15:14:42 GMT -5
Ok…um…right then… Sorry, I don’t usually take on this kind of thing, let alone parade it out for others to critice so bare with me then, yeah? Ok, so- like almost everyone else here I have caught the UMAP bug (no pun intended) and have been quietly obsessing over every little bit I can get my hands on thus far. For my part, I have only contributed two little doodles to the fandom (see link below) and now having moved and with no access to a scanner that’s probably the most anyone is likely to see of me for some time. HOWEVER a rear occurrence has taken place and I have the sudden urge to fiddle with (of all things) a fanfic. I say rear because, alas, my command of the English grammatical system is…poor at best, and spelling, forget about it. However I have this itch and with what little time I have to myself I thought, why the hell not, let’s see where this takes us. So I would really like two things, should anyone be so inclined to reply. First, I would love to through the general plot out there and see what, if any, interest there might be in this kind of a story. second- well I’m the kind of person who loves feedback and even more, I love to bounce ideas around with others. I find it makes for better writing and sometimes even better stories. So should anyone be interested in becoming a kind of ‘conceptual beta’ just let me know. The one down side is, well, it will probably ruin the story for you, seeing as how you might be privileged to plot twists and the like. The story- Well its called ‘La Vie en Rose’ and it would hopefully pick up a few weeks to a month after where the movie leaves off (or, as of now, where I am assuming the movie may leave off). So we have Francoeur who is continuing to try and piece together this new existence of his whilst carving a nitch of his very own. One day whilst out and about with Lucille Francoeur wonders off and through complete happenstance rescues a little old woman from a rather unfortunate automobile accident. The old woman is very grateful and before poor Francoeur knows what’s what she is ushering him into her little shop. She is a gypsy you see and for his selfless good deed the woman intern wants to read his fortune- and it is a good one at that. Francoeur is excited to learn that, among other things, life holds a great romance for him- but possibly at great cost. The gypsy, sensing his distress at these words give Francoeur a charm and a potion saying that, when he is ready and willing these gifts may give him the chance he needs. Cut a head a chapter or so and Francoeur finally takes her up on the offer, and we go from there…Francoeur gets a new adventure, Raoul a new rival, and Lucille- a very difficult decision. I’m afraid to say more lest I spoil the bulk of the story, but in short it is a helpless Lucille/Francoeur piece of dribble that is in need of quite a bit of revising, a more clearly defined nemesis and some definite polishing. Any instinctive reactions? Thoughts? Anyone wanting to maybe loan a hand or a thought or two to this pitiful outline of a story? Fan art links (as mentions above) L’Eclipse- miskantle.deviantart.com/art/UMiP-L-Eclipse-257839231And of coarse ‘All in the Cards’ from La Vie en Rose- miskantle.deviantart.com/art/UMiP-All-in-the-Cards-258766432
|
|
|
Post by siffyleafylav on Sept 25, 2011 15:58:59 GMT -5
Hello gigi, No Doubt i have talked to you before, and I just want to, again, compliment you on your drawing you have made,so far.
I completely agree with you, feedback does not only gives readers a chance to voice their opinions, but also helps the author with finding new and maybe better twists for his/her story.
So far I've been too busy to grant the forum a new chapter or story, seeing that I'm either stuck with Ohmerde or trying to dabble. -Which never really does work-
Reading the plot here, i cannot help but SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL in joy because I really liked the visual little scene you drew out for us. *the comic*
I would offer my help, seeing as I love to read and write, but I'm not quite sure I'll do more harm than help. My way of thinking does it to people all the time.
A small introduction or prologue into this tale might be a start.?
|
|
|
Post by gigi on Sept 26, 2011 11:18:39 GMT -5
You…like MY work…well...well, well, that does make me gitty. Thank you- that means quite a bit from one of my all time favorite writers in the fandom to date. *giddy and jittery*
Ok, ok, calming the hell down. Now- *cough*
To be honest- the crazer the sounding board, the better I tend to do. When it comes to writing feedback theres nothing I like more then someone who is a polar opposite to my own work- there usually the ones who dig up the best stuff and though me the greatest curve balls, but I wont drag anyone into my nonsense without full permission- tempted as I may be.
Hmmm…prologue or introduction you say…there’s where I start to run into problems. Ok, problem (singular) because I have yet to get a good grasp of Francoeurs ‘language style’ as of yet. It has its own rhythm in my mind, and I have yet to find the right balance between childish naïveté and unread scholar. In short, I see him as very bright, but very ‘new’. There’s also the frustration of his ‘non verbal habits’- something I would be completely willing to ignore if it didn’t play such a vital part to the overall story…damn it…
Anyroad, intro…right. I might be able to whip up some demo doodles/ concept sketches- I don’t have a scanner at the moment, so I would be posting them here exclusively, but maybe that might get something moving in my or someone else’s head
|
|
|
Post by siffyleafylav on Sept 26, 2011 12:52:55 GMT -5
"All time favourite writers" ?I feel honoured *and giddy too* We all have our weakness' and our strengths, and there is no shame in admitting you aren't as good as others; that's life in a nutshell.Maybe you'd be kind to 'allow me' to help you tweek it a bit. I could give those little notes you that might say : "There should be an IS at the end, or something like that. Drag me in as far as you'd like- You have my permission! "Unread scholar" you say? mmmh, do elaborate! Doodles are a must when your trying something new, and it helps you visualize the flow of the story, the first two pictures you drew - Marvelous, I am still struck by the realism!- seemed to make me believe there was more to it than just soe prett cards- that woman is magic! As for your last bit, "The Butterfly Effect" seems to be a good explanation, when one artist shows his or her work to another, this may trigger some deep primal instinct to grab that 4H pencill and drawdrawdrawdrawdraw!I hope you can get right to it, but don't let yourself feel pressured; it can make you sloopy( Like with me )
|
|
|
Post by gigi on Sept 26, 2011 18:57:14 GMT -5
Really, like really really I can abuse you’re genius eeeeeeeee! *insert happy dance here* Unread scholar- yes, not the best term but I cant think of a better way to describe it. they are the types that, while not traditionally well read, seem to posses a natural intellect all there own. Not street wise mind- but the kind of person who, though they may know noting of the topic, is quick to pick up the highlights and fill in the gaps. I don’t know why but Francoeur strikes me as someone with that capability- just naturally intuitive and inquisitive, you know? Ok doodles…and these definitely qualify as doodles. Very rough sketches and definitely major massive spoiler material for at least one half of the story. Bet you didn’t see this coming *insert copious amount of sarcasm here* This is Bayard (or who I am calling Bayard unless a better name sticks). Note the conspicuous muttenchop sideburns, the gentle almost innocent smile, and most damning in later images…the gap in the front teeth. Obviously not an original character… Bayard Again Bayard and Lucille (VERY rough sketch) And of coarse, the infamous (in my mind anyway) “Can I kiss you” Moment Ok so…*fidgets* thoughts
|
|
|
Post by siffyleafylav on Sept 27, 2011 0:25:54 GMT -5
You're making this too easy too love, luv. First of all, who was the idiot that made you believe you can't draw beautifully? I'd like to get acquainted and kick him in the head repeatedly with a frying pan. SPOILERSSPOILERSPOILERS!!! I just flat-out SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELEED at the Can I kiss you picture , my dear Gigi you are too good! *katowskatows*
|
|
|
Post by gigi on Sept 27, 2011 14:13:09 GMT -5
*big, fat sigh of relief* I’m so glad you like- I think my biggest concern with the story is that people may not like me… ...well, tampering with Francoeur’s good looks. I mean, it’s tantamount to introducing a new character to some people, you know? And as rule I tend to avoid OC’s unless they are absolutely crucial to plot ie. Gypsy fortune teller. And I’m SOOOO glad you liked that last one, seeing as it’s the visual that kind of instigated the whole story. I dont know why, but i just see him as the kind of guy who would ask that kind of question...To bad it kind of ends sadly, or rather that moment does at any rate. I have a thing for suspenseful angst driven moments, can you tell? MORE SPOILER: Essentially, right before they actually kiss Bayard moves to take her hand and the feel of her wedding band (yes she is engaged at this point) stops him dead in his tracks. He pulls away and murmurs something to the effect of ‘what kind of monster would I be to put my heart before yours’ (too cheesy, I know, I’m working on it) and kisses her hand instead before running off. Ack! I’m having too much fun with this proto fic! And VERY packed schedule permitting (damn you university *shakes fist*) I am sooooo eager to start it. The thing is, I’m still tied up on a few details that are holding back my proverbial pen. Do you think, if its not too much trouble, I could PM you with the big plot holes?
|
|
|
Post by siffyleafylav on Sept 27, 2011 14:17:40 GMT -5
A WEDDING BAND??! SHE"S ENGAGED?!? You cruel, cruel creature....Oh well, a little romance is at least some romance, however much I cannot control you if you wish it. *be still my beating heart~* PM me, overload me with your message's, I am your muse and your assistant.- and you'll be my muse, if you allow it?
|
|
|
Post by gigi on Sept 27, 2011 14:48:29 GMT -5
*wicked grin* oh come on now- I needed something to tip him out of ‘Its ok madam gypsy lady, I’m actually ok with who I am and am sure Lucille loves me just the way I am no matter what’ mode into ‘holy.crap.I’m.about.to.loss.everything.and.am.willing.to.risk.it.all.in.the.name.of.love!!’ mode. First rule of acting- whenever possible raise the stakes. The higher the bar, the more there is to loss, and the more you have to loss, the farther individuals push themselves into bazaar and uncouth acts. It’s a pet peeve of mine when characters act without just cause…so as much as it kills me, I am still obligated to set the bar that justifies the act. (I’m not trying to justify a writing choice I sooooo don’t want, I don’t know where you got that idea…stop looking at me like that.) ok…beware pm’s
|
|
|
Post by siffyleafylav on Sept 27, 2011 14:51:48 GMT -5
*stops* How the hell did you know I was "looking at you like that"
I only noticed I had aglare on my face the moment you mentioned it...- Physhic-!
You'll have to explain your last skeem though, it kinda flew over my head. *dodges shoe*
|
|
|
Post by gigi on Sept 27, 2011 15:11:35 GMT -5
Hahahahahahahahaha!!! Cause great minds think alike I suppose, and I figure I would be giving me the same look where I in you’re shoes. It’s a dirty, dirty plot trick I’ll admit, but someone had to do it Besides, that’s the beautiful thing about engagements…no one has said ‘I do’ yet….
|
|
|
Post by siffyleafylav on Sept 27, 2011 15:29:41 GMT -5
Oh well... as long as it's not Maynott *vomits* Ugggh that man--just eww.. Just no, no. No. We're getting off track here, are you starting yet? Or are we gonna babble until the wee hours? -I got work I have to be awake for in the morning...insommia~- There's a chat *points down* that way we can talk quicker ( Though a lot less about spoilers...)
|
|
|
Post by gigi on Sept 27, 2011 16:10:09 GMT -5
ICK! Madam, I have my standards!!
*tee-hee*
|
|
|
Post by gigi on Oct 2, 2011 20:47:58 GMT -5
Ok Siffy (and anyone else who a happens to be pocking in on my ramblings here) two directions I may or may not use in this fic…If I use them there definitely spoilers, if not…well there just interesting. and i really wish i had a scanner so...yeah...this...I feel somewhat awful for this. but it is here...and it is not exactly...innocent. I'm so bad... so yeah...thats a direction I have absolutely NO idea how this would EVER come about...but here’s a scene...thing...that has no context read in a 'Z' format Incase the dialog doesn’t come through, here’s the general thought of the dialog (Corny dialog is corny!!) Bayard: …Lucille…Oh, T-thank God…I was so w-worriedLucille: *sob* *sniff*Bayard: Lucille? Your c-crying? Lucille a-are you a-alr…Lucille: Why would you do this to me!!All this time Francoeur!! You lied to me, all this time!! Why!? Why Francoeur!Bayard: I…I don’t knowI’m s-so sorry Lucille…I couldn’t…couldn’tLucille: God just- just shut up FrancoeurPlease just shut-upis so ashamed...
|
|
|
Post by siffyleafylav on Oct 3, 2011 0:28:33 GMT -5
*mouth is agape* O/////o ohmai I likey the first picy* evil grin* NIcenicenicenice1 Kinda like his longing for her affection got his head all weird, and is trying to show how compatible they are by makin'love to her And the second seems like a VERY likely end, which I will love. Just the spoiler I wish NOT too know is how (DON"T ANSWER THIS QUESTION!) ANywho, more plz?
|
|