comique
Member
Love born from song
Can never post anything right the first time.
Posts: 298
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Post by comique on Sept 14, 2011 22:06:19 GMT -5
Oh oh oh oh-Kay here's my dabble, I just finished it. Themed "Preoccupied", because really, Lucille is a little distracted... WARNING!THERE ARE SEXUAL IMPLEMENTS IN THIS STORY.IF YOU ARE UNDERAGE OR JUST DON'T LIKE IT IN GENERAL. THEN DON'T READ!If not, enjoy! WONDERFUL! *clap clap clap* ;D I love it when they "purr" their R's. <3
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Post by NeonAzure on Sept 14, 2011 23:40:19 GMT -5
OK, I finished it. Just over 2000 words. But, GOOD LORD is this DARK!! Readers, beware; there's no fluffy-ness in this one. Uh... Themed "Blood" for reasons that will become QUITE obvious. Rated M for Mature... (god, why did I write this?!) Attachments:
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Sharky
Member
Omnomnom <3
Posts: 76
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Post by Sharky on Sept 15, 2011 0:58:35 GMT -5
-new here- Hiya :D Just wanted to add my little comments. ^^Okay! Here goes nothing, here's my entry: 'Le don de la vue/The gift of sight'. The theme is 'Eyes/Sight', because it occured to me that when he was a 'regular' flea, Francouer would be blind. Sorry if it's a tad short, and I've taken a couple of liberties with what the cabaret layout is like/having an acessable roof (and I also wasn't quite sure whether 'The Rare Bird' was it's title or just Lucille's title, hence I've left it reffered to as simply 'the cabaret'). Enjoy! ;) Ooooh am I a sucker for little details! You made something as simple as eyes and sight very interesting! :D The interest Francoeur had in his new eyes made him even more adorable than he already is, and it caught that childlike curiosity he seems to have very well. That flashback with Lucille was nice as well. I'm sad there wasn't more of it. xD Delightful little read overall. :3Oh oh oh oh-Kay here's my dabble, I just finished it. Themed "Preoccupied", because really, Lucille is a little distracted... WARNING!THERE ARE SEXUAL IMPLEMENTS IN THIS STORY.IF YOU ARE UNDERAGE OR JUST DON'T LIKE IT IN GENERAL. THEN DON'T READ!If not, enjoy! My, oh my! Very sweet and sensuous, as well as sexy without being distasteful in the least. The switching between past and present was nicely done. It flowed smoothly. :) While we all love sweet and innocent Francoeur, this suave and romantic version of him is just as engrossing. If I were Lucille I would have messed up my performance fairly quickly. ;) Very lovely! :DOK, I finished it. Just over 2000 words. But, GOOD LORD is this DARK!! Readers, beware; there's no fluffy-ness in this one. Uh... Themed "Blood" for reasons that will become QUITE obvious. Rated M for Mature... (god, why did I write this?!) Oh my lord. It may be a dark fic but it is gorgeous (in a macabre sort of way)! If this movie was rated for mature audiences, I bet a scene just like this would exist in it. I especially liked Francoeur's inner turmoil about his feeding habits. It was so sad. :( Don't question why you wrote it! It's great! ^^ (I'm glad I took three years of French back in high school. I could read most of the French without using Google! xD)
Keep up the awesome writing, guys! You're all very talented. :3
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Post by siffyleafylav on Sept 15, 2011 1:06:59 GMT -5
I gave the most retarded giggle upon seeing this, and my mom nearly walked in on me!
DARK! Very DARK!
But seeing as we're already turning him into a irresistable talented object of love, we mustn't forgot how he started out!
DELECTABLE!
BEAUTIFUL!
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Post by NeonAzure on Sept 15, 2011 1:11:27 GMT -5
THANK-YOU!
BOTH of you. ^u^
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beccawolf16
Member
"From this angle, she's an angel."
Posts: 91
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Post by beccawolf16 on Sept 15, 2011 10:07:25 GMT -5
OK, I finished it. Just over 2000 words. But, GOOD LORD is this DARK!! Readers, beware; there's no fluffy-ness in this one. Uh... Themed "Blood" for reasons that will become QUITE obvious. Rated M for Mature... (god, why did I write this?!) You know, I'm really actually happy peope are getting around to addressing Francoeur's eating habits. I mean, he's a flea, he does eat blood after all. I think you wrote this really well, and throughout the story I felt sorry for Francoeur and his poor, confused feelings (I still want to hug him and tell him it's gonna be alright ;D). I also liked how you added little moments where his curiosity overtook his hunger. The little part where he was listening to the music was nice. Overall, it was a good read and a nice break from the fluff.
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Sharky
Member
Omnomnom <3
Posts: 76
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Post by Sharky on Sept 15, 2011 15:10:36 GMT -5
You know, I'm really actually happy peope are getting around to addressing Francoeur's eating habits. I mean, he's a flea, he does eat blood after all. I couldn't agree more, especially since I have a feeling the movie won't cover that since it's a kids movie. It would be a bit too dark, I think. But, we'll just have to wait and see. Ya never know~!
Until then, I demand more awesome blood-oriented fics! >:O
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Post by siffyleafylav on Sept 15, 2011 15:30:34 GMT -5
You know, I'm really actually happy peope are getting around to addressing Francoeur's eating habits. I mean, he's a flea, he does eat blood after all. I couldn't agree more, especially since I have a feeling the movie won't cover that since it's a kids movie. It would be a bit too dark, I think. But, we'll just have to wait and see. Ya never know~!
Until then, I demand more awesome blood-oriented fics! >:O :-* Just you wait and see, my dear sharky... :-X
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Sharky
Member
Omnomnom <3
Posts: 76
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Post by Sharky on Sept 15, 2011 15:41:22 GMT -5
:-* Just you wait and see, my dear sharky... :-X -bounces excitedly- But I caaaaan't wait!
Too bad I have no choice. </3
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Post by Zenoah on Sept 18, 2011 0:35:59 GMT -5
No real word limit. Just have fun with it. Also, these wont be voted on. Some things will have votes, others wont. I'll leave this open another week incase you guys want to add more; in case you cant really do the next Monster Monday.
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fede
Member
Cache ta lumi?re.
Posts: 24
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Post by fede on Sept 18, 2011 14:26:07 GMT -5
Here's my drabble, hope anyone likes it Dark and Cold, Bright and Warm
I was walking down the corridor, with a candle in my hand. It wasn't really late at night so I guessed Lucille would still be up, I wanted to ask her something. There was a storm on its way coming, and not a single ray of the twilight managed to penetrate from the thick curtain of clouds and reach down here. There were flashes of bright white light every now and then, but there was complete and utter silence. Not a sound could be heard but the hissing of the wind occasionally raging for a brief moment. Then nothing at all. I was halfway to her room when some wax burned my hand, I instinctively let go of the candle which fell to the floor where the flame extinguished in the blink of an eye. I rubbed my hand and was about to pick up the candle when I jolted. I exhaled, it was just a lightning creating shadows in the end of the corridor. But then I froze, everything was now pitch black. I could perfectly see in the dark, I wasn't human after all. But I hated being in the dark. If dark is silence and peace… well it isn't for me. I could see shadows in the dark, I know it doesn't make any sense but with my vision I could see them moving. And I hate it. It's like they're alive, jolting and twitching in the corners, swallowing up the lighter shades of the night. I ended up sit in the middle of the corridor, I crouched up and wrapped my arms around my legs. I was thrown back to my first days of 'life', of my awakening so to say. I was always hiding, ever since a person saw me and started shouting, I didn't understand the words but the shrieking was scaring me. So I didn't dare getting out in the street during the day ever again, when the dark came around it was easier to move. But when the lights turned on, people eventually moved and anything else twisted the calmness of the dark, everything wasn't still anymore, it was moving and scared me like I never knew. Every move could mean people screaming, or throwing things at me or just something bad happening. So I just hated being in the dark. I didn't even realize I hid my face in my arms, resting my forehead on my knees. «Francœur?» I almost jumped up, looked to my right, «Ehm… L-Lucille…» «What are you doing here at night?» «I… was, nothing» I didn't manage to say anything else. «Are you alright?» she asked then. «Yes, I just… I just… don't like dark places.» «Would you like to come to the kitchen with me? I'll prepare some tea.» «Yes» but I was still frozen in place. She reached a hand out and I looked up at her, she smiled at me and I was like revived, it was warm and bright and just beautiful, every time she smiled I felt like I wasn't a monster, I felt loved even. I placed my hand in hers and got up, even though I knew she couldn't possibly help me up for how big I was, it was the meaning of a gesture, it was all another thing. I prepared to feel her hand shift away from mine but she started walking and didn't let go of my hand, instead squeezed a bit harder and I smiled. We reached the kitchen and she lit up a couple candles at the corners of the room. I was standing in the doorstep and she smiled at me: «Have a seat Francœur.» «Thank you» I sat down and she started preparing tea. When the water was starting to boil she placed two cups on the table along with two jars. She sat down in front of me and poured tea for the both of us, she then picked up one jar and put two small spoons worth in her cup and did the same with mine. «What is it for?» I couldn't help but be curious of everything happening around me. «This is sugar, you put it into drinks like tea to make them taste sweeter.» I nodded then she said, «This is milk instead, it's another drink, it's got many uses and we also put it in tea.» Only when she picked up the cup I did so too, and I took a sip. It tasted nice, it was just so hot, I thought I might like it better a little colder. «Are you feeling better now?» she asked. «Yes thank you. Lucille… I… could I keep you company before you go to sleep?» «Absolutely Francœur.» We went back to her room and she invited me to sit in the armchair. She sat on her bed, leaning her back against the pillows. We had a little conversation before I picked up the guitar and started playing. She started singing on my music and that was just what heaven felt like in my soul. I could have gone on forever but when she started falling asleep I stopped playing, I closed my eyes and started listening to her even breathing, which to me, was still a beautiful music. It was a theme of calm and belonging, rhythmic with her heart. Somewhere in my heart I wanted to be able to be like anyone else, but if I could just be with her I wouldn't have asked for anything else. She was everything beautiful and made me feel the happiest, like I never imagined possible. I got up when she finally fell asleep, as I placed the sheet on her though she woke up, «You are going back?» «Yes, I'm sorry I woke you.» I thought she would just say goodnight but instead she got up and kissed my cheek, «Don't be.» I was on fire and she noticed, smiled at me: «If you'd like you can stay.» «I will.» She laid down and pulled the sheet over her, I took my place in the armchair again and she said in a whisper: «Goodnight Francœur.» «Goodnight Lucille.» She smiled then closed her eyes. She probably didn't know how much she meant to me and I didn't even realize it when I mouthed a few words, thank you angel…
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Post by siffyleafylav on Sept 18, 2011 14:43:45 GMT -5
Awww.
So gentle, so caring.
It warms the very icicles of my unthawn-able heart.
*goodlordthatwasdramatic*
You write beautifully.
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Sharky
Member
Omnomnom <3
Posts: 76
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Post by Sharky on Sept 18, 2011 16:32:17 GMT -5
Awwwwwwwwwww~! That was very sweet, and beautiful! <3 It made me all warm and fuzzy and cuddly inside. :D The bit about the shadows in the dark was really cool. I usually don't like first-person PoV stories but you wrote this so beautifully that I was easily sucked into it. :)
Absolutely gorgeous. <3
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fede
Member
Cache ta lumi?re.
Posts: 24
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Post by fede on Sept 19, 2011 15:55:55 GMT -5
Thanks guys
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Cerberus
Member
Keep Calm And Carry On
Posts: 29
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Post by Cerberus on Sept 20, 2011 11:46:33 GMT -5
Aww, that was so sweet. It made me feel all cosy and safe! :3
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